Year End Blues

1.5 days until the end of 2012. It’s been a depressing year for me. It’s been so blue that I’ve thought about ending it all, at various points of the year.   What happened to the saying what goes around comes around?  I’ve been giving what I have and what I don’t have.  But I’ve yet to see anything returning to me.  Some may argue that perhaps I gave with the expectation of getting something back in return, so therefore nothing comes back in return. But doesn’t everyone?  One would expect life to be better after giving, not worse. Who in the right mind expects life to the worse, after giving.  Something must have gone wrong somewhere. But I know not where.  I’ve given all I could possibly give and yet today I end up being worse than ever.

I thought it would come back, so I gave more than I thought I could give, though I was very afraid.  Thought and faith are 2 very different matter. I had the thought but not the faith.  Maybe this is the lesson(s) I have to learn from 2012.

1.The thought is right, but without the faith to back it up, it just wouldn’t happen.

2. Do not overextend myself in giving, for my faith is not strong enough

never give up.

And so with this retrospective insight, I will now ask for the strength and courage to face and fix the mistakes I made in these 4 years.  If you are like me, let us ask together.

Give us the strength and courage to overcome our obstacles.  Give us the inspiration to live on and love the world greatly whether the world loves us back or not.

Never give up.  Give up, NEVER !!

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